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Have you heard of the DINK trend?

  • Writer: michaellapauu
    michaellapauu
  • Jan 25, 2024
  • 3 min read

Updated: Apr 8, 2024

I recently came across this trend of DINK (double income no kids) couples. The whole premise is that they have built their life around having all the money and all the time in the world all because they don't have kids.


Now, if you choose to live this way, so be it, do you! But the problem I have is the way some people have used the term to mock having children.

Also, I could go on and on about how much more fulfilling life is with kids, even if it is financially more difficult and your time priorities change.

But that isn't the point of this post.


This trend led me down a "think hole"-- yes, a term I made up. Get it..... "rabbit hole"....."think hole"?.....anyway...-- of how we speak about our children, husbands and overall family life.


Is what we're saying about our kids and our husbands giving them value or making them seem like a burden?


Now, I will be the first to admit that I have absolutely fallen into conversations where, at the time, I felt like I was just simply venting about my life. But then later looked back and saw that I was actually speaking very negatively and grumbling more than anything. Or more recently, when motherhood was just simply hard, and I found that all the conversations I started led to me complaining about motherhood.


The Lord has heavily convicted me in a lot of areas pertaining to this, and I am so grateful for the change of heart as well as the awareness to guard my tongue in those situations. I'm not perfect, nor will I ever claim to be, but it's an area that I'm learning and growing in.


Motherhood is hard, marriage is hard, life is hard. But one of my favorite parts from M is for Mama is that Hard is not the same thing as bad.


But sometimes I think we get caught up in "venting", especially when things are hard, and then our language around our family is depreciated.


Look, again, I'm speaking to myself as well.


And this is not to say that we shouldn't have people in our life that we can turn to when times are hard. Community and support are super important. But more than anything, I think it's about having people that we can turn to who will be uplifting and encouraging when we feel the need to vent, rather than joining in on the complaining. And we can be that for others when they come to us as well.


Praise the Lord that I have those friends in my life that I can speak to honestly and know that it is met with love and encouragement and that it doesn't spiral into a complaining session. If you are one of them, thank you, you are a blessing!


Lastly, I wanted to share my thoughts on this because I think there is a thin line between what is truly venting and reaching out for support, and what is grumbling. And in a culture that does not necessarily value marriage and children as much as they should, we (again, speaking to myself) need to be guarded when we speak and make sure that we are giving value to these things. Making sure that our children and husbands are blessings and not burdens.


Maybe the more of us that speak positively about children and marriage, the more we shift the narrative away from DINK'S, and more to SILK's.....Some Income and Loving Kids (it's a work in progress lol)






"Do all things without grumbling or disputing."

Philippians 2:14





SIDENOTE: I am in no way coming at anyone that has liked the DINK trend, put themselves in that category, or anything. It simply prompted my thought process around how we view having kids and families. Because unfortunately, a lot of the videos I've seen in this trend seem to have a negative connotation surrounding parenthood. It just kind of felt like the trend contributed to the general decline we see in valuing children and the nuclear family. That is all....no shade thrown anywhere!


I've actually seen a lot of DINK videos done very tastefully as well!

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